


Cannibalism

by Debz_Baumaus



Series: Funny and Fluffy Sidlink One-shots [1]
Category: The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Crack, Crack Relationships, Ficlet, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings, One Shot, Valentine's Day, sidlink - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:22:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22702411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Debz_Baumaus/pseuds/Debz_Baumaus
Summary: Link overestimates Sidon’s general cultural knowledge about Hylian behavior.(In which Sidon thinks Link’s kiss after confessing his affections is an attempt to eat him.)
Relationships: Link & Prince Sidon, Link/Prince Sidon
Series: Funny and Fluffy Sidlink One-shots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1864114
Comments: 9
Kudos: 286





	Cannibalism

Link may not be brilliant when it comes to complex knowledge like Zelda is with ancient languages and science. He’s a man of instinct. His intelligence derives from experience and a careful analysis of his surroundings. What he doesn’t learn from observing Lizalfos’s behavior for hours, he assimilates from wounds and failures.

He’s become a natural at interacting with people since he woke up from his long slumber; granted, he is still short of words, but his actions have gotten him very far through all of Hyrule. He had easily won over the hearts of its inhabitants, and even knew how to appease and play with the red Bokoblins.

So, yes, it would be very logical of him to not plan this out much. Goddesses know that even King Dorephan found his feelings for his son quite obvious, as well as the profound fondness that the Prince himself exuded towards the Hylian champion. It wasn’t a matter about what his response would be, but about wooing him more with his blunt honesty.

As sappy as it may sound, Link was willing to bring the moon down to Earth for Sidon (metaphorically, in reality, the thought was a dangerous one that gave him a headache, for some reason).

And so, here he was, meeting his dear Sidon at midnight in front of his sister’s likeness just as he had every day he could since they’d first met. Kneeling was a no-go, Link was short enough already, thank you very much. But Link was a great climber, so he went with that. A way to show-off his strength and ability, a way to get intimately closer to his love’s charming face.

“Oh! Link!” The way his white cheeks turned red like the scales of his tail still amused him. In spite of Sidon being constantly exposed to Link’s sudden schemes, he never failed to react with wonder. Yet one of the many things Link loved about him.

“You startled me, my dearest friend! Glad to see you’re feeling so energetic,” Sidon faltered, his pupils grew and the gold in his eyes shone like the sun, “and so close”.

He couldn’t contain his bubbly giggles. This Zora was the most muscular and second largest of them all, but he acted like a sweet, innocent child, so adorable~! “Sidon, I have to tell you a secret.”

The day had finally come. “What is it, my friend?” Link’s hands rose from their tight grip on Sidon’s shoulders, one went to caress a fin that framed his face, the other brushed his cheek. “I am in love with you, Sidon. I want us to have a relationship beyond friends. Would you like that? Do you feel the same?” His hushed whispers almost got lost in the midst of his nervous panting. He wanted this to end, all the endless pining, the overt flirting that went nowhere but to his failing lungs, he wanted this love to finally become real.

“I-I. Link!” His eyes widened and his tail began to sway in glee. “Yes, my dearest! Of course!” Sidon squeezed him against his neck, nuzzling his hair affectionately, slightly hopping from foot to foot in joy. “My dearest, my love, how much I have waited for this.”

“Me too,” and then he pulled back and staved his heart’s thirst for those perfectly plush lips that he had memorized through his long months of yearning. He threw his arms around Sidon’s neck and clung to never, ever be apart from him.

The Prince’s gasp made him proud at first, but fearful shock followed as his beloved scrambled to pull him away and let him slip from his grasp and onto his wobbly legs that ended up giving in until he was kneeling before Sidon. His eyes held shiny pearls of water, both his hands covered the mouth he had tried to claim and conquer. “L-link! I thought you loved me! Why would you do such a thing?! Did I anger you? Did I say something wrong? W-What-.” His voice cracked like a teenager’s, and he took two steps back, but even those two steps were way too many for Link’s liking.

He was at an utter loss. What happened? “Sidon, what’s wrong? Y-you-. You didn’t do anything bad, I was just kissing you!” The fear and sadness wouldn’t leave his semblance, but Sidon tilted his head in question, “Kissing me? Is that expression synonymous to feeding? I hadn’t heard of it before. Why would you attempt to eat me, Link?! Is it because I’m fish-like or something? Is this a twisted ploy of you Hylians?”

He couldn’t believe this. This wasn’t real. Was Sidon so sheltered that he didn’t know about kissing? Hadn’t he read about it, at least? Then again, he _did_ grow up during a time in which the Domain had been quite isolated from the rest of the kingdom. And he hadn’t ever ventured beyond his own race’s borders, not when he was the sole heir and family left to the King. Not when monsters and Guardians roamed around.

_Huh._

“Sidon, kissing is perfectly normal, at least for Hylians. People share their love through kisses as anyone does through hugs. It’s about joining lips, basically, to show intimate affection, um, between couples only, though.” Link stood up, but looked down to his boots, “I’ve wanted to kiss you ever since I knew how I felt for you.”

The tears had faded and Sidon regarded him with a soft, apologetic smile. “I’m sorry I didn’t know. I truly thought you were trying to take a bite out of me or something. And not in a -ehem- romantic way.” He fumbled and waved his hands, “Not that I’d be against that, as long as you give me a heads up, I’d enjoy being physically intimate with you when we get to it. Um, anyway, I-I’d like to try, now.”

Link finally looks right into his eyes once more. “I’d like to try that kissing business. Will you teach me?”

Link grinned until his eyes were almost closed.

“Gladly”

…

Since then, all Zoras have witnessed their many styles of kissing so many times that this cultural barrier has ceased to exist completely, to the amusement of the young, to the horror of the elderly, and to the outright delight of the King.

Link, on the other hand, has discovered the wonders of Zora teeth and their long tongues.

FIN

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Twitter @ContrastMinds for updates, brainstorming, and commissions.


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